sorry for the long time no reply (aka noone is actually immune to the consequences of ED)

Firstly, I'm really sorry i havnt posted and replied to questions for the last couple of weeks.

I now have an indwelling catheter. This is a result of an SI injury to the nerve tissue connected to my bladder(ie a deep cut in a bad place) and the fact that years of binging and purging are not good for your kidneys. This means that i now have to walk around with a bag of pee strapped to my leg, with a very uncomfortable tube shoved up my pee hole. Did i know i'd damaged my kidney-did i heck. In a way, its good it got noticed now. so, I may end up having a kidney removed, in which case i have to get better or die basically-and when you put it like that, doesnt recovery seem nuch more like the answer here?

I'm not writing this to freak anyone out. Heck, im ashamed for it. Bt i wanted to use it to illustrate the point that NO-ONE is immunt to the physical consequences of eating disorders and self injury. you might well read this and think, well 'that will never happen to me'.

good luck with that.

sometimes a reality check does you real good in terms of recovery. I went through a very bad patch, die to some difficult issues in my personal life-and this is the wake up call for me to get my recovery going in the right direction again. You can only ever try your hardest.recovery doesnt happen over night, and to be fair, ive seriouysly lackied in the support stakes.

But now i know that i need to get better.

Before getting better isnt a choice i have any longer.

is your eating disorder worth this? mine might be comforting in times of stress, a habit to fall back on. BUT ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.

wake up call.

I'll be working through the email and post questions in the next few days-and if your now doubting my abaility to answer these questions-i never said it was easy to recover, and I have always pointed out that the people that write this blog answer from personal experience, and are not professionals. so please dont shout at me!!

xxxxx